When couples are first dating, everyone puts their best foot forward, man and woman both trying to be as attractive and desirable as possible to each other. As time passes, and the relationship deepens and leads to marriage, the passion that was so powerfully charged in the beginning can begin to wane.
Whether you have been married four years or 40, times of sexual frustration for one or both partners will occur. A less-than-satisfying love life can be remedied, though.
Sexual Problems and Your Health
Some health issues can have an effect on your sex life, so before you begin addressing your frustration, you need to make sure that both you and your partner are in good health.
One of the most prominent diseases that can cause problems with your sexual life is diabetes. Diabetes impairs not only your body’s ability to process glucose, but it also affects the neurological system, circulatory system, and cardiac health. According to a study conducted at the University of Chicago Medical Center, men who had been diagnosed with diabetes were not only more likely to have a decreased interest in sex but were also far more likely to suffer from erectile dysfunction.
Erectile dysfunction may also be caused by some other illnesses and conditions. High blood pressure, high cholesterol and heart disease all have a negative effect on the condition of the blood vessels in the body. Atherosclerosis, the hardening of the arteries, makes it difficult for the blood vessels to properly dilate and allow the smooth flow of blood to the body’s organs and tissues, including the tissue of the penis. This can make it difficult to get and maintain an erection.
A visit with your doctor and a thorough examination will determine if your loss of libido and sexual frustration is treatable with medication and lifestyle changes. Doctors will often prescribe vasodilators, such as Viagra or Cialis, that work to open the blood vessels and improve the flow of blood. By increasing the quality of the blood flow to the penis, these medications help a man to get an erection and maintain it.
A woman’s sexual life can also be affected by her health and any underlying issues or illnesses. Research suggests that 43% of women have reported some form of difficulty with sexual dysfunction that is the result of a physical or psychological problem. Women can also be affected by diabetes and heart disease, as well as hormonal imbalances that can reduce a woman’s libido and make it difficult, even painful, to have sex. Treatment and therapy can help a woman to deal with any sexual problems and overcome them.
Once you and your partner have dealt with any medical issues that could be causing your lack of sex, you can begin looking at other ways to improve your communication and reignite the spark.
Good Communication is the Key
One of the major reasons, if not the major reason, that married couples find themselves frustrated sexually is a lack of good communication. Talking about sex makes many people uncomfortable, and when it comes to two people in a relationship, discussing the pros and cons of their sex life may seem impossible. Both partners may feel guilty about being dissatisfied and afraid that the other partner will take any comments as negative criticism rather than constructive. However, intimacy and the natural spark of attraction increase when a couple is open and honest with each other about everything, including sex.
Addressing the lack of sex in your relationship has to begin by clearing the air. Talking about it will help you determine what the cause of the problem may be, whether it is negative emotions, medical issues, even stress.